Asking Her to Lock You Up

Asking your wife or girlfriend to lock you up in a chastity cage can be a stressful event. If these type of sexual activities are out of the norm for your relationship then it may come has a huge shock to your partner and they may reject you and even make you feel foolish or like a creep. That’s why we want to help you prepare for this conversation so that you can easily convince her that locking you up is the right thing to do.

In order to start the conversation to ask her to lock you up, you first need answers to the following questions that your partner will likely ask: why? what? how? what’s in it for me?


When most people hear the word “chastity” they think of female chastity devices (like Maid Marian has in the movie Robin Hood: Men in Tights) or abstinence for religious reasons. Male chastity is a newer trend that they may not have heard about so you will need to explain to them what it is and how it works. Having a chastity cage to show her is helpful to show her what it is and how it works.


Men have lots of different reasons for wanting to start a life of male chastity so this answer will likely be something personal to you. Here are some of the common reasons:

  1. Controlling sexual energy. The longer you’re in a relationship the less sex you typically have. This leads to pent up sexual energy and eventually to you masturbating. Then when you finally give in, your partner is finally in the mood and you’re unable to perform. Or maybe you just start masturbating so much that you just lose desire to be with your partner. Either way, a simple solution for this is to have her lock you up. Once you’re caged, your sex drive will be increased and focused on her and whenever she’s in the mood, you’re guaranteed to be ready.
  2. Removing temptation. Whether it’s temptation to masturbate or to fuck the hot new neighbor, having your wife lock you up will end this temptation because you’ll no longer be able to act on these temptations. This one may be hard to admit to your partner, but if you’ve had issues in the past that she knows about, then this may be a big selling point to her.
  3. Wanting to be a better husband. Talk to any man who lives a male chastity life and they will tell you that being caged has improved their relationship. Using chastity devices focuses your energy and gives you more time (no more masturbating). Your energy is going to become devoted to your partner and making them happy. Why? Because they control your dick and your ability to orgasm. A few weeks in a cage and your partner will see a completely different man, especially with some proper chastity training.
  4. Giving up control. Some men whether holding powerful jobs or not, often want to relinquish some control or just want a sexy woman to control them in general. Starting a chastity life with a partner who gets into it will quickly accomplish this desire.


The how is going to be largely dependent on her interest. If she’s not that interested it may just be that you lock yourself up and give her your key and then she can unlock you when she wants to have sex. Or if she’s interested she may start locking you up as a punishment or demand that you’re wearing a cage 24/7 and that she always has your key (you may need to work up to this). Give her resources like this blog to read so she can understand more about the male chastity life.

What’s in it for me?

This has already been partially answered with the why, but here are some bullet points to refresh:

  1. You’re in control of our sex life. You can have it whenever, wherever, however you want.
  2. You can trust me. There’s no chance of me fooling around because my dick will be locked up and in your control.
  3. My energy will be more focused on you and making you happy.
  4. You won’t have any guilt when I come on to you and you’re not in the mood because sex is now based on your desire only.


Be prepared for any other possible questions that your partner may have. She might do her own research and find that male chastity is often related to other BDSM and femdom activities not to mention men wanting to be sissies. If these are your goals/desires, then be prepared to talk about them; if they are not your goals, then be ready to reassure her of your actual goals. Ultimately, your male chastity life with your partner will be unique to you so it is important that you relate to your partner what your expectations are from both chastity and her.

Be a smart husband and buy yourself a chastity cage.
Be a smart husband and buy yourself a chastity cage.

One thought on “Asking Her to Lock You Up

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *